Three years ago in March I was at a bar in North Tonawanda with Heather when I got a message asking me if I’d dress in drag for a charity event. Mildly unnerved, I shared it with her and asked her what she thought about it.

For all intents and purposes, we had just started dating and she liked to embarrass me at the time (you should see the things she used to write on my Facebook when I left my phone unguarded), so she encouraged me to do it. After checking with the powers that be at work, I agreed — somewhat reluctantly.

Three years later, I’m signed up again to be part of the Peaches & Creme Fashion Show, a charity event benefitting Relay for Life. This will be my fourth time in drag — well eighth, really if you count the fittings that come about a week before the show.

You see, all us guys go to Maurices, the main sponsor of the event, to pick out a … wardrobe? … costume? … Um, I guess we’ll just say “dress.” We also get to pick out some accessories like jewelry and scarfs and whatnot. Then the night of the show, we put them on. Maybe some nail polish. Maybe a wig. Whatever makes us pretty.

I mentioned this is for charity, right? But that doesn’t mean I don’t take it seriously. Apparently I’m quite the diva, according to Heather. I mean, if I’m going to dress up and be on stage for the entire world to gawk at, I’d like to look nice. I know I’m going to make a fool of myself, but can I be a good-looking fool?

Anyway, we model our dresses for the crowd at the Palace Theatre and have a lot of fun while doing it. There’s also a talent contest which I have heretofore avoided but am considering doing this year if my favorite Lockport bartender (Simon Chavers from the Pleasant Valley Tavern) will join me in making a fool of myself. He’s signed on as a “model,” but hasn’t fully committed to the talent part yet.

The event is coming up on May 10 and it’s going to be a lot of fun. All the guys involved have tickets for sale for $10 each if you’d like to come out and see me in drag in person. Or they’re available at the door for $15 at the door. If all you want to see a picture of said abomination, I know they’re floating around the Interwebz somewhere.

Yes, this means I’ll never be governor or senator or anything, but who cares about that. We’ve got cancer to cure.